Thursday, April 14, 2011


I think it's super swell when I have fruit and flowers at the same time. Makes things feel all warm and cozy and homey and nurishing and lovely and such.
This is my coffee table at current state of existance. Messes like this honestly: drive me nuts. But, I have learned that I have to let it go and let it be (at least for a bit) cuz I can't control these forces that are against me. They have the power and persuasion. I am just here, holding my breath and accepting what I cannot change (until they are in bed at least).
Sweet Moment: Sitting in the school parking lot a few minutes before pick up time, I notice Ben and one of his teachers coming around the corner of the building together. Ben is holding a fist full of Dandelions. I assume they are for me (and they are). I think about how fortunate we are, that Ben has such a compassionate teacher (Ben told me he was crying and she helped him find some flowers for me) and I think about how blessed I am that my little boy has a heart of thoughtfulness and giving.'s that same little boy in a time-out today.

Time Outs. Sometimes I wish I could have a time out or 2. Like just a little bit ago...when Isabelle came in the house with her glasses...broken. The neighbor girl tried them on (took them off her head without asking), completely stretched them out and has basically broken them. I don't know what the hell she did to them! (excuse my hell). They are majorly screwed up! they won't stay on Isabelles head, they won't even stay on mine! Why did she even touch them in the first place? I am angry. Let's even say: livid. I yell at Isabelle that they are expensive and they are NOT a toy and the girl had NO business touching them! I yell at Isabelle and she cries. (instead I should have just took a run through the woods and screamed my head off and came back...but then noone would watch the baby and she would get everything out of the cabinets and dip her hands in the toliet and she would probably get a hold of the glasses and break them some more, so actually it was best I did not take off). Isabelle is sobbing and I am so angry. This is right now and I must calm down. I am hoping that I can fix the glasses properly. I need to breathe. I feel like a horrible jerk being so mad, but I AM mad! I need to go make dinner, I will update on the situation later. Just shar'in some real life. This is it, in all its glory. Uncontrolable Messes, Time-outs, Broken Glasses...and some Dandelions as the Saving Grace of the moment. I am thankful for Dandelions and the little hands that picked them...I am hopeful for some precious Time-Ins to repair not only a pair of glasses, but also a little girl's broken heart.

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